WHAT IS A FOSTER PARENT?

The Merriam Webster dictionary says to foster is to "promote the growth or development of" or "to give parental care to."

As a foster parent I am providing a home and a safe environment for the children in my care.  I show them that life is good and model good and appropriate behavior.  I do things with them that they may never have had the opportunity to do with their own families.  They are provided nutritious meals, clothes and toys to play with.  They are taken to doctor and dental appointments regularly.  Most importantly they are given lots of love and affection, opportunities to express themselves and learn to deal with their emotions while in my care.

When children are brought into care there are many changes going on in their lives, often they are leaving everything familiar to them behind (families, friends, schools, pets ect).  This brings alot of emotion and I am part of a team helping the children work through their emotions.  It is very important for the children to have a peaceful place to live.  All children need role models and this is especially true for children who come into foster care.

I have many challenging opportunites, but these children benefit greatly by the love and support they are given through a good foster family.  With research that shows foster children being at risk of becoming poor Americans in society it is my responsibility to advocate  for them and to get them the best educational opportunities possible while they are in my care.  Teaching them  adequate life skills so that they can be more successful is also a responsiblity that I take seriously.

My responsibility as a foster parent is to be a team member, a skilled caregiver, avocate, a behavioral managment specialist, a parent, teacher  and a multitude of other skills.  The decision to foster parent is life changing and requires the involvement of the entire foster family, it won't work otherwise.

I am a colleague among the child welfare team and have a voice in decisions being made for the children in my care. I have the responsibilities that many traditional families have, but also have responsibilities to the child welfare system.  Keeping informed about special needs children and meeting training requirements are part of what is expected of a foster parent.  This helps keep us on track and knowledgable of how to work with the special needs of the unique and individual children in our care.

There is nothing greater than knowing that, as a foster parent, I can make a difference in the lives of these children.  That I can help direct them down the right path, see them transformed and have a future and a hope.

DINNER TONIGHT

Getting serious about meal preparation starts in our home around age 12. Of course, along the way, the children learn how to prepare and butter toast, fry eggs, assemble a sandwich ect. But by the time they reach age 12 I find that they are ready for much more involvment in the kitchen. Tonight´s dinner was completely prepared by my son with only verbal instruction. Garlic fried chicken tenders simmered in a white cooking wine, mashed potatoes and a bowl of garlic-mustard dressed salad.

This boy did an amazing job! It is well worth the time spent instructing...The priceless gift of yet another day.

Children and Life Skills

I am often thinking about how I can equip my children for the real world, of the pure simpleness of childhood and the day to day makings of a grownup.

There are many areas in which my children will need instruction before becoming adults in order to know how to take care of themselves and loved ones in the real world, academic education is not enough.

I have most always included the children, from very young ages, in the everyday activities of life, but I remember, at times, thinking oh, but he is too young, he can´t do that.

When we intentionally expose our children to the everyday skills we take for granted,  they  become equipped for adulthood.

As parents we desire so much for our children. We want the best education and the most enriching life for them, but often that means sports, dance, art classes and more activities outside the home. These things do have value, but are they preparing our children for the everyday life and challenges of adulthood?

When I pray for my children, first I pray that they will love God for a lifetime, and that they will be a reflection of Him in their lives. I pray that they seek Gods purposes and that He will give them vision for their lifes path in career, marriage and their own families. Yet, in times past, praying for them to learn the essential life skills of banking, grocery shopping, or cleaning a bathroom never crossed my mind. However, it is the small and the large life skills that will help them get along in adulthood.

God has shown us our obligation as parents and by training our children to be prepared adults, wise and responsible we are giving a gift to their future spouse, children, employers and friends.

The simple, practical lessons of life are invaluable to our children´s future.

Making Good Habits

So often we are concerned about imparting good habits into our children, but neglect the formation of good habits in our own lives.

We want our days to run easy and smoothly, but many times neglect the formation of habit to dominate our days. Instead, we allow each day to take care of themselves. This kind of thinking will bring frustration and discontentment to the atmosphere of the home and our precious families will suffer because of it.

I believe that if a mother will discipline herself and establish habits that are beneficial to her life, they will easily become habits to her children.

As a mother I have often failed in this area, not having formed my own habits sufficiently. Being inconsistent rather than determined not to fall into the tempation of complacency, because, well, it´s just easier.

Mother's have busy and full days, especially homeschooling mother's, and if we don´t allow the proper habits to form, by discipline and determination, we can expect nothing greater than mediocrity or quite possibly failure, in which case we best be on our knees in suplication to the Lord for help. This brings me to what I believe is the most important habit we need to form in our lives; prayer.

Each day can bring so many distractions for a mother, with days that are full to overflowing. The interuptions that steal away our good intentions must be fought with self-discipline and perserverance. Prayer and time of fellowship with God will do much to improve our ability to be consisitent in every other area of habit. Finding that space of time in the day to spend with the Lord should fit into our daily lives just as eating and sleeping - as natural as waking up each morning. A bit of discipline and determination, as we spend time each day with God will be a benefit to our entire family; what a tremendous responsibility we have...